Well shit, April is over and I’m still a damn fool. It’s been a busy month for me; stepping into a new role at work, new season starting for my hockey league, an absolute shitshow trying to moderate my town’s FB community page, and finding games/music/tv shows to help drown on the ever-present drum beat of time marching ominously forward. Oh, and getting very little sleep because apparently that’s just my thing. How about these jokes, though?
4/4
Back in January it was announced that my town's trash service would be undergoing some changes. People were mad. Those changes finally took effect this week. People are still really mad. But I will always look for an opportunity to make light of a situation and my local FB community page has been a big source of inspiration for me as there has been an endless stream of posts about the trash company over the past few months.
4/8
Not gonna lie, I took some Immodium earlier just to make sure that wouldn't be on the list of reasons why I may potentially miss the eclipse. Control the things you can.
4/10
I have decided that the reason I can't sleep at night is because the Sleep Fairy only grants a finite amount of sleep to each household and my wife keeps stealing my hours.
4/20
Nobody ever taught me how to Dougie.
4/21
"It's okay, today is Cheat Day." - Me every single day as I have cookies and ice cream for a meal.
4/25
"Please, call me Willy. My father was Mr. Nilly."
4/29
Woke up at 3am to water streaming into my basement. And now I'm trying to remember why I wanted to own a home so badly. I don't wanna be responsible for all this shit.
Fun thing about those images I made early in the month, apparently that pissed off some people so much that there was a whole new discussion about how much I suck in one of the 4 or 5 “I Hate Ryan Rick” clubs that have sprung up on Facebook. And honestly, the fact that those groups/threads exist on the internet would probably bother me if the people who were actively involved in them weren’t complete shitbags. It is okay to be hated if the people that hate you are garbage, remember that.
-Ryan