I don’t really have a lot to say about this month. Every day is more absurd and I’m just writing my little jokey-jokes.
2/6
I didn't really read any news ahead of time about who or what was going on with the opening ceremony of the Olympics, so I don't know if Mariah Carey was a surprise to everyone or just to me. But of all the things I was not expecting, I think I was not expecting Mariah Carey the most.
2/6
Honestly, I think I am mostly just angry that Mariah Carey was there and they didn't even have her sing "Fantasy".
2/6
As long as I live, I don't think I will ever not be excited about Jamaican bobsled teams.
2/8
2/13
You know how when you tie down something in a trailer or truck it's standard practice to grab the strap, give it a little shake, and say "that's not going anywhere"? Do people do the same thing for bondage?
2/14
Getting some mixed signals from this place.
2/21
You're never "too good" to eat cold spaghetti at midnight like a gremlin. Stay humble.
2/26
I fucking love vlookups. I would name a dog Vlookup just so I could tell it I love it. And then I'll get a 2nd dog and name it Pivot Table.
2/28
Crossed up some wires in my brain today when Carly Simon's "You're So Vain" was playing and I was trying to apply the lyrics to Dave Coulier.
I’m gonna go dissociate for a while. Later!
-Ryan