It is October. On the one hand, that means hockey is
back. On the other hand, that means we
are now officially in the complete shitfest of a season that is fall, barreling
stupidly towards the equally (if not more so) shitty season of winter. It’s getting cold and it’s getting dark
earlier and I hate it. But you knew this
already because part of who I am fundamentally as a person is to endlessly
complain about how much I hate those seasons; it’s core to my being. But back to the positive, hockey is back. And
speaking of hockey, after news that the league I was playing in was going to
fold, I have become a co-commissioner of that league in order to help it
continue existing, so that is new and fun.
We actually start our new season tomorrow and I am hoping to actually be
cleared to play from my knee injury within the next few month as well. And as you can see from the jokes about both physical
and mental therapy, I appear to be doing just fine.
9/2
I was chatting with some co-workers
about how much I love the functionality of MS Excel (nerd!). Then I busted out
this bad boy on them.
9/7
One of my favorite things to do as
a dad is to sneak foods that the kids claim to hate (onions, mushrooms, etc.)
into the dishes I make for dinner and watch them happily chow it down,
completely oblivious.
9/10
When you get a new microwave and
are about to try out the "Popcorn" button on a bag of microwave
popcorn for the first time...
9/12
My wife was laying on the floor
trying to play with one of the dogs. I thought the visual looked familiar...
9/14
I know some people are concerned
about Mercury being in retrograde, but my living room lamp is angled to the
southwest, so in the land of made-up nonsense I think it all cancels out.
9/17
If you wax and curl your mustache,
then I assume that you also tie women to train tracks.
9/18
I had no idea I could earn tickets
or prizes for this. I've spent my life doing it just for the hit of dopamine.
9/19
Came across this ad last night
while I was up late, unable to sleep. Thought it wasn't quite on the nose
enough, so I touched it up a bit for the sake of accuracy.
9/25
I do not understand how Renaissance
Faires work. Can you just show up dressed as the king? If multiple people do
this, are they obligated to go to war?
9/26
This afternoon I have physical therapy on my knee, followed by
donating blood, and then a CPR class. So today is a delicate balance of eating
and drinking enough that I don't pass out donating blood while also not
overdoing it to the point that I vomit during my PT exercises. And making sure
I am still awake for CPR.
Also need to make sure I keep all of the scheduling straight
because I'm only supposed to bleed at one of those places.
9/27
When your office is downstairs but
you just had leg day.
9/30
The American Idiot album came out in 2004. So the song Wake Me
Up When September Ends has been around for 18 years now.
At this point, repeating the "wake up that guy from Green
Day" joke has the exact same energy as telling the cashier "guess
that means it's free!" when an item won't scan.
I had a couple
of consistent strings of daily jokes there.
Nice, look at me go. Don’t get
used to that though, I like to keep expectations low. Of course, if you are reading this at all,
you likely already have exceedingly low expectations for me, so I think we’re
okay.
-Ryan
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